Incredible Hulk and the random of the randoms
by Rare but somehow funny
Summary: Random stories of the Incredible Hulk... Thank you Jackie, Eric, and Crys for your help! Enjoy! Hopefully
1. The Incredible Hulk Goes Shopping?

Ello! 0.o This story was made in my Freshmen year along with 2 other friends who I love very very much as family. But I killed them. Just kidding. For your information, this was an inside joke. We 3 took turns writing, so just look below and you'll see the different fonts :) Enjoy!

Yours Truly, Tere is Completely Random

**Jackie the Magnificent Irish Extravaganza but is also completely random **

_The Artist Formerly Know as Eric but doesn't really want to expose himself but he did anyway :)_

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The Incredible Hulk...Goes Shopping?

** It was an amazing day outside, and Bruce Banner had ripped his favorite pair of jeans! AAH!**

** "Dammit!", he cried. He decided an expedition to the mall was in order. He put on his sweatpants and headed out the door.**

**As he approached his car, he dropped his keys. As he ws reaching down to pick them up, he noticed a squirrel on the top of his car. It stared at him with beady black eyes. **

**"Hello, Mr. Squirrel", said Bruce, picking up his keys. **The only response from the squirrel was it crapping on his car.

** "Crap", muttered Bruce.**

_And then the flying ninja monkeys attacked. They had metal tails and they ripped the squirrel in two, making him the super ultra maximus dead squirrel from the 17th dimension. Dah Dun Dahhh!_

"Wow", said Bruce.

_Then Bruce found an inflatable clown. The button said press me. It went "Kick some ass...kick some ass...kic...kic..Kick some ass bitch."_

He drove 15 miles to the mall, and was furious when he was caught in **quicksand! His car was sinking further and further with each passing second, and he was so mad that he was going slightly green. **

**Suddenly, his muscles were growing, his clothes were too tight for his body, and he was turning into his alter-ego, THE INCREDIBLE HULK". Soon enough, he had grown too big for his car and the car exploded.**

_In his mind because Jackie can't write and has no imagination. The monkey that killed the squirrel had then possessed the monkey. The monkey then saved Bruce. It had become the Bruce and the Flying Ninja Squirrel Monkey. But then the monkey exploded and the bomb was armed as the dangaling chipmunk slowly went down on the snowboard._

The green monster ran all the way to a huge building filled with innocent people and clothes.

"HULK WANT PANTS!", he roared, and stomped into the mall, pushing people pout of his way.

"ME WANT PANTS! NOT TOO BIG! NOT TOO SMALL!! ME WANTS JUST RIGHT!"

Just as he found the right pair of pants, he immediately tried them on. When he turned to look at himself, discovered a stain. Later on..all hell broke lose.

END!! Tehe :)


	2. The Incredible Hulk Orders Pizza?

Hey you sons of B***es! How are you all? Never mind... I don't care... JK :D

So.. I was just checking my stats and found out that this story was on alert. Why? Do you all want to over work me? Just kidding.. I'd be happy to be over worked. My aunt inspired this chapter. I had a little help from my little cousin... she added somethings at the end. I'll highlight them for you :D

I hope you enjoy this.

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**THE INCREDIBLE HULK ORDERS PIZZA?**

After coming back from work, Bruce Banner collapses on the couch, While leaning forward for the remote, his stomach was making the rumblies that only food can satisfy. He sighs and deliberately gets up to the kitchen. As he opens the refridgerator, he discovers nothing!

Angry at the discovery, his skin slowly began to change to a sick green color. His clothes started to rip due to the massive transformation, The process was done, and the Incredible Hulk rushed out of the houses to fulfill his hunger.

Screams and accidents were all that's audible while Hulk reached Pizza Hut.

He enters the restaurant and makes his way to the front counter, He looks up the menu and wonders what will satisfy him. Just as he decides what he wants, an attractive cashier waits for his order.

"Hello, Sir", she pipes up. "How are you today?'

"Large", responded Hulk, looking at her with a hungry expression.

The cashier was taken back but still took his order. "Ok...umm.. will it be plain or paperoni?"

The Hulk raised his eyebrows in fury. "No pepperoni! No pepperoni!"

"Ok, plain it is, it'll be ready in twenty minutes, sir."

"No twenty minutes!!! READY NOW!!"

"Hang in there, sir."

"RESPECT MY HUNGER!!"

"Sir, it's ready now."

"What took so long?", he asked quite outraged. He inhaked the pizza's aroma and soon enough he was back to his original human state. With his order, Bruce sat by a nearby table and stared at his meal.

_He opened the box, ready to enjoy his large plain pizza. All seemed well..... until his eyes saw a single round pepperoni in the middle of the pie. _

All Hell broke lose!

END!!!


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